Category Archives: muslim

>OBSERVATION: Be a zealot for Halloween?

>As I look forward to the coming of Halloween, and selecting my hidden personality dress-up option, I suddenly realized that zealotry seems to be reflected through permanent fashion. I mean you can actually dress up for Halloween like some real people do every day.

Examples.

Today’s left wing radicals are often seen wearing their best 1960s radical hippie attire. While once a modern subculture style, the Jesus look-alike hair styles and rumpled poverty-esque Raggedy Ann and Andy attire can now only be viewed as some sort of neolib costume. Less radical liberals have sustained the pre-WWII tweedy cum academic look of the early Communist sympathizers.

Then my mind drifted to more extreme examples of zeal-driven dress codes. Until recently, Catholic nuns and priests were going around in clothing designed during the Renaissance – the remnants (no pun intended) of which can still be seen among the more zealous religious orders. What did God have in mind to decide that devotion depended on the resistance of modern style from that point in time? Why the Renaissance?

Then I wondered. What did the God of the Amish liked so damn much about that late 1800s? And not only haute couture but every other modern development from the electric light to the automobile.

Of course, up popped the Muslims. Apparently Allah decided that the fashion of devotion stopped about the time of the Christ, in whom they do not even believe. Did you ever notice that a lot of the Middle East war photographs depict scenes that look like sets for a Cecil B. DeMille biblical movie? What is with these theological fashion time warps?

Then I realized that as a conservative, I have no symbolic attire – no historic look that instantly tells the world what I am. (Okay. Okay. I heard that. Neanderthal? Very funny, but not truly relevant.) I cannot think of any right wing sect that has maintained a fashion for more than a season as an expression of philosophy. There was a moment that the Gatsby look of the Roaring 20s might have had a chance, but no.

I am eternally appreciative that the 1970s were not the time of conservative zealotry. I shudder at the thought of being permanently attired in hip hugger bell-bottoms (Yeah, men had hip huggers, too.), Nehru jackets (which were a throwback themselves) and ruffled tuxedo shirts

Looking back was no help in selecting this year’s costume. In the past, I have been a pope, a rock singer, a Chinese emperor, Dracula (not my most creative year) and a bumble bee (that may have been). Some say that customs reveal a portion of the inner psyche. If that is true, I don’t even have a theory as to the meaning of the bumble bee.

Still undecided is this year’s costume. Hmmmm. I could go in drag, but then everyone would mistake me for Rudy Giuliani. I could dress up like a liberal. Now, that’s a scary idea. If I can come up with enough global warming one-liners, I could go as Al Gore. Like: “A newly discovered major cause of global warming is hot air emanating for Al Gore’s mouth.” Hey! Cut me some slack. This is still a developing thought.

Maybe I will just stay home, put on a grotesque mask and scare the crap out of little kids who come to my door. Teach them a valuable conservative lesson. There is no such thing as free candy.

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>SIDEBAR: Sex and theology are a putrid mix.

>Freedom of expression means that we, as a society, must endure the offensiveness even of the dysfunctional sociopaths. I was reminded of this, when one of my computer searches came across the crucifix dildo. This let me to a site of religious hate products compiled by a wacko named Jim Walker. (You can click on photo, if you care to read that ad copy.)

Now allow me to make myself clear. I have the utmost respect for different opinions, and I am more of critic of organized religion than an adherent. However, it is hard to imagine anything short of human violence that could be more repugnant to any concept of civility, tolerance, understanding and decency than the garbage offered on this site. To sugggest that this site should be taken as an overall expression of satyrical humour is ridiculous. Granted, there are a few things that are edgy funny. (In view of the headlines, the stained glass window of the priest being serviced by the alter boy IS funny in an editorial cartoon sort of way). Unfortunately, the collection as a whole reveals too much hatred to be listed under “humour.” People who can only claim fame by shock value are pathetic creatures — deserving of more pity than scorn.

Walker’s anti-Christian obsession is not benign. It is a disservice to society by offering a rallying point for similar sociopaths. His “no beliefs” would more aptly be called “no decency.” If Christians were as maniacal as the fundamentalist Muslims, the creators of this type of pornography would have met Allah a long time ago – and no 40 virgins. Not even one. Of course, Walker is a non-believer, so he will spend his newly discovered eternity without a god — and definetly no virgins.

Oh! I noticed his collection of anti religious crap did not include any Muslim products. No Allah pornagraphy. In addition to being a sociopath, our dear dememted Mr. Walker is a coward. He is like the bully who only picks on the little kids.

Afterthought: I never quite understood the Muslim promise of a gaggle of vestal virgins as an eternal reward. If I have my druthers, I would prefer a room full of sluts. I mean … we are talking eternity, here. Also, if we leave our bodies behind as we enter heaven, do we still have the equipment to enjoy carnal pleasures? Don’t scoff! These are important theological questions.